Click Book Summary By Rom and Ori Brafman

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"Click" by Ori and Rom Brafman is an exploration into the fascinating phenomena of instant connections and explores what makes us feel a strong bond or attraction towards something or someone.

This book delves deep into the science behind that extraordinary feeling, while also providing guidance on making such magical connections more frequent in our everyday lives.

Through engaging stories from diverse perspectives, including sociologists, psychologists, therapists, spiritual teachers, and more, "Click" helps readers understand how connection can lead to greater happiness in life.

Whether looking for love or discovering more meaning in life, this book provides insights that could profoundly change your understanding of how the world works.

Click Book

Book Name: Click (The science of magical connections)

Author(s): Rom and Ori Brafman

Rating: 4.2/5

Reading Time: 23 Minutes

Categories: Communication Skills

Author Bio

Ori and Rom Brafman are two brothers who have achieved the prestigious honor of being New York Times Best-Selling authors, through their books Sway and Click.

Ori is an organizational business consultant, who is also the co-founder of a network which fosters peace and development among projects.

Rom is a psychologist who has won awards for his teaching excellence, which promotes positive human growth.

He has an impressive private practice in Palo Alto, California.

These two brothers have created quite a reputation for themselves with their success as acclaimed authors.

Exploring The Phenomenon Of Click: An Overview Of Ori And Rom Brafman’s Book “Click”

Rom Brafman's

We all want to instantly connect with others, but how can we do it? Click dives into this question and provides valuable insight on how to create meaningful connections in a flash.

The Brafman brothers look into the forces of quick-set intimacy and offer practical ways for us to increase the chances of building common ground immediately.

You’ll discover why sharing something personal instantly makes people get closer.

For instance, finding out why a hostage negotiator would share their own traumatic story with a complete stranger helps explain what it takes to bond with someone in an instant.

Understanding why first meetings can send such vibes of euphoria or even produce magical moments throughout the entire relationship is important as well – it’s key to establishing trust and heightening group cohesiveness quickly.

Also gleaned from Click is the explanation behind how just being around those of like minds can lead you to feeling secure (and therefore make those “clicking” moments happen) right away – no matter how close knit their community is.

With this book, understanding the impactful dynamics of quick-set intimacy has never been easier!

What Is Clicking, And Why Does It Feel So Good?

Clicking is an incredibly unique experience.

It happens when two strangers unexpectedly meet and feel a powerful connection that is highly pleasurable and almost magical.

When you click with someone, it can feel like you’ve known them your entire life – even if it’s just been a few minutes of conversation.

Neuroscientists have studied this phenomenon and discovered that areas in the brain typically associated with pleasure are particularly active during clicking.

This intense activity has been compared to that of taking drugs like cocaine – an indication of euphoria.

Many people have also shared stories of these moments when they felt an instant connection to another person and described them as energizing, thrilling, special or euphoric.

This response was consistent across individuals belonging different social groups – regardless of their backgrounds or circumstance in life.

Love At First Sight Leads To A Long And Passionate Marriage

Clicking is something special and it can add a certain je ne sais quoi to the relationships it initiates.

When psychologists investigated what contributes to happy marriages, they found that couples who had felt an immediate and intense connection when they first met usually had a passionate marriage even after 25 years.

In comparison, couples who became friends before getting into a romantic relationship or those who went through the traditional courtship period were less passionate and much more similar to each other.

Nadja and Paul is one example of this – these two met at work and experienced a special quality about their meeting and interaction.

After only three days, Paul asked Nadja to marry him.

Even 15 years later, despite any challenges they’d faced in the meantime, the initial spark still added a magical quality to their relationship, resulting in both of them striving together to make it all work out.

The Benefits Of Clicking For A String Quartet: Improved Communication, Creative Problem-Solving, And Mutual Support


It’s true that we all perform better when we’re with people we click with.

It has been shown time and time again that successful teams, such as a string quartet highly depend on their members clicking with each other.

Why? Because it leads to effective communication and improved proficiency.

For instance, if two people in a close relationship click they can understand each other without using many words – leading to fewer misunderstandings.

Plus, those who click will be able to recognize musical cues more easily, discuss difficult matters constructively, persevere through hard times, support one another and make daring decisions as a team more easily.

This has been proved by experiments such as MBA students assigned to tasks unknown to them; the groups that clicked performed 20-70% better than the other ones.

The bottom line is: if you want to succeed at something, you have a much higher chance of achieving greatness when you work together with someone you click with!

How Vulnerability Can Help Create An Instant Bond With A Stranger

When you make yourself vulnerable to others, it sends a message of trust and makes the connection between you stronger.

It’s like an invitation for them to get closer to you, which is more likely to result in a positive outcome and establish an intimate relationship.

This phenomenon has been proven in studies where complete strangers were encouraged to ask each other probing and increasingly revealing questions.

Even though they had never met before, many of them clicked because of the openness that was established among them.

It’s the same idea that hostage negotiators use when dealing with volatile captors.

A negotiator will wait for the right moment and reveal his own difficult story to show his vulnerability.

When the captive sees this, he realizes that he can trust this negotiator and they can begin to connect on a deeper level – leading ultimately to de-escalation of the situation.

Proximity Facilitates Social Bonding And Increases Attractiveness

When it comes to clicking, spatial proximity also plays a significant role.

This is borne out by the amazing comeback story of the Florida Gators, who won 17 consecutive games despite losing their top players – all because their new teammates had become roommates and clicked very well on the court.

Scientific research backs up this notion too; a study on cadets at a police academy found that nine out of ten named their seat partner when asked who they’d become close with – better than any other criteria like age or shared interests.

The logical conclusion is that being near someone leads to numerous opportunities for conversation and thus social bonding.

Moreover, people tend to view familiar people as more attractive than strangers.

A study confirmed this theory by having four equally attractive women attend psychology classes; most of the students confessed to preferring the women who’d attended more classes over those who hadn’t turned up as often.

It Takes More Than Skill To Deliver An Engaging Performance: Flow And Audience Connection Are Key

Audience Connection

If you want to captivate an audience, you have to be attuned to their emotions and responses as well as fully immersed in your performance.

That’s because a great performance requires the performer to be in a “flow state,” where they can achieve a total yet effortless concentration.

Seeing an actor in such a state will change the atmosphere in any casting room – suddenly, the words being spoken are just right.

While technical ability is important, it isn’t enough to create an unforgettable performance.

To really connect with people, performers must be aware of the mood of the audience and adjust accordingly – almost like reading the room.

A great stand-up comedian will know when the crowd needs cheering up or need something else entirely – if they don’t read and respond to their cues then they won’t make them laugh.

This kind of connection between performer and audience is mediated by mirror neurons which create neurological contagion – when one person feels emotion, everyone else begins to feel it too.

This means that if a speaker/performer can get themselves into a flow state, then their enthusiasm and energy can spread through their audience!

The Power Of Similarity: How Shared Traits Can Lead To Friendship And Success

We all tend to be more agreeable when it comes to connecting with people similar to us, whether it be donating money or hitting it off with someone.

This is because these similarities give us a feeling of kinship and, as a result, make us more likely to invest in that relationship.

One example of this is when women are approached by someone raising funds for a charity they are much more likely to donate if the fundraiser shares their name.

In another experiment, students who thought they had the same worldview as someone else rated them highly attractive.

Similarity bias can also extend to other positive attributes such as intelligence and morality in addition to attractiveness.

There was even one experiment which showed that participants were twice as likely to assess a paper if they thought the student asking shared the same birthday with them!

Why Shared Adversity And Clearly Defined Groups Make Instant Connections Possible

In many cultures, including Native American culture, coming together to overcome adversity is seen as an essential part of creating a sense of belonging in a close community.

For example, when they huddle together in a sweat lodge and endure the intense heat together, they form a strong bond by connecting emotionally with one another’s stories.

The shared adversity serves to bring everyone together in camaraderie and can be seen in situations such as groups of colleagues bonding over their dislike of an abusive boss.

It allows people to let down their guard and make themselves vulnerable by temporarily forgetting about the social norms that are normally imposed upon them – such as maintaining their public persona – thus forming deep emotional connections with each other.

These tight-knit communities also ensure that members have clear roles and parameters which create an environment ripe for instant connection and ‘clicking’ between its participants.

By functioning within the rules of the group, communication between members is kept safe within its boundaries – resulting in outrage when someone reveals private information to outsiders.

Furthermore, the physical proximity encouraged by being part of a well-defined group allows for intimacy to flourish among members and creates a sense of similarity which further boosts connection.

How People Who Click With Everyone Adapt Their Behavior To Different Social Contexts

Social Contexts

Some people seem to be naturally born with traits that make them more prone to click with others.

These individuals are often the life of any party, or the ones most people want to hang around.

It’s not just their looks that make this happen- it’s how they interact with others and how attuned they are to a given social situation.

These people have developed a heightened sensitivity to both moods and social context.

This means that when they find themselves in an intimate dinner setting, for example, they pick up on the atmosphere and make sure their voice level is appropriate for the environment.

They also quickly recognize if a conversation partner is becoming bored and can swiftly switch topics without missing a beat.

One of their most helpful traits though is self-awareness: they always monitor their own body language/emotions so that they present themselves according to what another person wants or needs.

No matter who they’re interacting with or how different character types can get along – these people can facilitate healthy communication between parties while making everyone feel comfortable and cared for!

Wrap Up

The Click Book by RomillaReady and Tim Regan is a great read because it offers some interesting insight into the moment when two people or a group of people instantly connect.

The authors identify three key factors – proximity, openness, and shared traits – that promote “clicking” between individuals, and emphasize the importance of these moments for forming relationships or boosting team performance.

The main takeaway from the book is that by focusing on similarity and bringing teams together through common challenges you can increase your chances of fostering a click-worthy relationship or team dynamic.

All in all, this is an essential read for anyone looking to deepen personal connections or improve their team’s performance.

Arturo Miller

Hi, I am Arturo Miller, the Chief Editor of this blog. I'm a passionate reader, learner and blogger. Motivated by the desire to help others reach their fullest potential, I draw from my own experiences and insights to curate blogs.

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